Since going natural, my hair is showing more signs of being salt and pepper (in back) but still contains a large splash of the golden blond that I've worn since high school. Have you considered what happens when your hair color changes in the middle of your favorite fashion season? In this case, fall fashion?
Well, it means that the warm shades of brown, tan, and camel just don't look the same as they used to, because I had been clinging to a color and style no longer suited for my life style.
So, when packing recently for a trip, I attempted to fill my suitcase with new colors in shades of gray, denim, and ruby red. I'd have to say the new colors are proving to be more complimentary that I'd every anticipated. This pic was snapped by my husband as we waited for a crossing parade. The oversize black glasses were a fun balance for my now very short hair and the colors complimented my skin tone well.
Finding the right shade to compliment your skin and hair can do more to elevate confidence than any of the latest trends.
Shop your own closet first for colors that compliment, then consider adding more as you build your own collection. Many resale shops divide their tops by color to get you started.
Whether a young woman on the go or aging graceless like me, we would love to support you on your color journey. Hashtag us at #recklessresale if posting pics of your fall fashion color story, we love to support creatives of any style!
Oh, and all those colors I can no longer wear? They are for sale this season in our Poshshop along with many other pretty warm colors to compliment this season.
Receive $5 off your first purchase anywhere on Poshmark when you sign up with code NELYS, and happy poshing.
Last year my handsome husband of 28 years decided to go natural and having dyed his hair since a serious foot injury brought on premature graying at the age of 40, he really wanted to reduce the stress of trying to look younger. The result was a success and he literally went from being my long hair hunk to a silver fox for sure.
So, after some consideration I decided to join him on the path to natural hair which would mean using less hair products in the long run, reducing our carbon footprint again, so why not?
My original intent was to grow out my hair long enough, so I could cut into one of the signature bobs that I've been wearing since childhood. Sometimes the bob was longer than shorter, sometimes it was asymmetrical, but almost always in the same style. Unfortunately, the growing bob created a type of halo containing my natural growth with the color treated ends below gradually becoming dry and unruly.
The lowest point of my journey was captured digitally while visiting friends in Michigan. My generalized inflammation was so great at the time, I found it difficult to style my hair, so it was a mess. I had just finished a second-round steroids which made me bloat and feel awful, so I was feeling monstrous. When our Michigan guest took us to Sister Lakes Brewing Company for dinner, I found it profoundly significant when greeted by a huge Sasquatch garden statue on their patio. Was this an omen? If so, not a good one.
Fighting to regain my health I fought through the fog of depression with prayer and meditation. I had family and friends praying for me too. But the problem with my hair weighed on me and my unwillingness to let go of a style that I must have subconsciously considered part of my identity.
I had only two choices: keep growing it out or get it cut. Growing it out was my original plan, but it meant waiting.
Enter my amazing hair stylist, Anne. I showed her a few pics and ideas and she made it clear that she was not going to be able to remove all the color treated hair but would do her best. She suggested a shorter version of my usual bob, but something inside of me knew that was not going to help move me forward, so I told her this:
The blond bob was my mom hair, my drama teacher hair. What I need now is something fashion forward, something different, something that will inspire me experiment with new styles without being held back by old habits.
Of course, when she was complete, and I looked in the mirror with mixed feelings. What had I done! This is the shortest cut I've ever had in my entire life. I suddenly didn't feel like myself. I spent the next day on the phone with my mother crying like Anne of Green Gables about her lost tresses.
But, remembering my initial goal of reducing the number of products used in my hair helped me focus again on the importance of self-love and giving myself grace to express the emotions that arose with this next step in life.
Now, I've got a fun style that looks great with tall collars and scarves so I'm very excited to be rocking this hair style during the beautiful fall fashion season. Will I keep it this short? Who knows. But I've learned to trust my instincts, trust the professionals, and that any decision to lighten your carbon footprint and reduce stress is a journey worth taking.
Go with me!
Shop our Poshshop for alternative fashion styles for reckless women of all sizes and any color hair, natural, blond or even blue.
We spent a morning in Tinley Park, IL this weekend where we visited our favorite farmer's market and I tested out this vintage Union made polyester shirt with short sleeves, button-down, retro plaid top in Millennial Pink and gray. Pairing it with skinny crop jeans and my red summer sandals gave the ensemble the pop it needed to work. Added a pair of retro sunglasses and a straw market bag and it worked. I loved the texture of the soft fabric so smooth to the tough, but it was just a little too small so it's now getting ready to get its picture taken and added to our Poshshop.
Designer, Beth Dreyer, from Fabulous Fleece and More has a square at the Tinely Park Farmers Market. I fell in love with her cotton pillowcases in cute designs and have been purchasing and testing several of her products this summer. Now, she is collaborating with Reckless Resale on the design of our own market bag! She shared a prototype with us this weekend and we gave it a debut at Mariano's. Because it's in development, I can't give you all the dets except that it contains a divider that helps keep things separate without having to carry a second bag. I personally like this feature and something I've not seen this in this style bag.
Beth has been a small business owner for years and counts emotional compensation as a social reward of selling in small communities. The depth of that wisdom is something I'd like to attract to Reckless Resale. We're on a journey here and are meeting some amazing people along the way. It's going to be a walk to remember.
Little finds from our farmers market and garden!
When someone uses the phrase “aging gracefully” I usually cringe. Knowing my limitations and recognizing as Elaine Benes admitted in the “Jackie O” episode of Seinfeld “I don’t have grace, I don’t want grace, I don’t even say grace.” (Actually, we do say grace, we’re not ungrateful, just klutzy.) But having grace? Gaaaagh!
Two years ago it was my dear husband’s time to celebrate this passage. Since that time, I’ve watched him transform from a cool confident state of mind into a man determined to embrace aging with faith, friends and family. Together we decided to engage in living as organically as possible within the boundaries of our responsibilities. Turns out, turning 50 is not as fearful as I thought, in fact, it’s proving to be quite liberating.
Where my husband has turned into a silver fox with his lengthening platinum hair, mine is growing in sporadically with more wisps around the ears and brow than I once found comfortable. I originally began coloring my hair when a young clerk offered me a senior discount at the ripe old age of 39! Now, ten years later, I’ve grown weary of coloring my hair and want to apply the organic life style to the way I style my hair. But I’ve got a secret weapon with a hair stylist that understands my desires and fears. She recently blended in my growing roots with silver highlights giving me the confidence to keep moving forward together, me and the hubby can go gray together.
Something happens to our eyebrows when we age, as least it did for me. Back in college, I had eyebrows to rival Brooke Shields but as I aged, and they continued to grow unruly, I submitted to removing (plucking) any offensive or wayward growing brow hairs. Eventually, my brow line became so thin and adding brown liner looked worse and worse (like painting clown lines across my forehead). Now, I’m in the patient process of letting them grow. As difficult as it was to get started and succumb to the pressure not to pull stray growth, I left them alone. Organically, they began to grow into a defined brow line.
Why do I bother sharing these observations? Because it’s the type of personal editing we all face. Think about all the re-edits you’ve undertaken over your lifetime (young or old). We can’t edit our age, but we can always edit our choices. And the wisest choices are those that help us live an authentic and organic lifestyle. I have no intention of meeting the conventions of aging within a market that places unrealistic expectations on beauty. Are you in a similar place? Let’s journey this transition together, as gracelessly as possible.
Finding a purpose can be motivating.
I love my family; they motivate me to be a better person.
I love my neighbors and friends; they motivate me to learn more about my community and help our neighborhood stay safe and beautiful.
I love my city; it's energizing activities and beautiful skyline remind me of the capabilities of men and women to develop, create and innovate.
I love the Lord; He constantly reminds me in his Word that I was created for a special purpose.
But sometimes the physical difficulties I face overwhelm all of these exceptional motivators. Finding a purpose within my work at Reckless Resale has been the motivating factor I need to keep working, exploring and loving without the insecurities that accompany poor health and business ownership.
When you see our brand name splashed across you soc media, remember it's all about the wReckage. Resale and Vintage clothing are not landfill fodder, the're not wrecked or ruined because of their age, apparent wear or possible damage. Most likely the wear has polished or softened the fabric and tarnished buckles and zippers giving them a antique and wise appearance. Resale and Vintage clothing have an important role in a circular economy that benefits everyone.
Similarly, I am not wrecked because of my age, my wear or damage. I am wRecked and wReckless and ready to keep moving in a world where being sedentary can be an easy escape from reality. But it can also become a life ending existence.
What motivates you? Leave me a comment or connect with me on Instagram or Twitter. Together, we can really make some wReckage!
I'm making dinner, a typical gourmet feast for two that has become the norm around our home lately. He approaches from behind and wraps his arms around my waist, burying his face in the back of my neck, he speaks.
"It's International Women's Day." He says.
"I know, I posted about it." I answer.
"Every day should be Women's Day."
"What? Really? Why?" I ask.
His face still buried in my neck, he mumbles a long and inaudible sentence. It tickles.
"What?" I start laughing.
More inaudible mumbling. His breath is soft and warm. Still tickles.
"You can't put your feelings into words, can you?" I ask.
"No. It's just that women are awesome. I love you." He says.
He should know. He has me and two daughters almost like me, not to mention the sisters and mother that are almost like me. I guess we are pretty awesome.
Happy International Women's Day, 2018, But remember...every day should be women's day!
Originally published on Story Behind the Cloth as part of their Valentine Self-love party, February 10, 2018.
We like labels. Colorfully embroidered, easy to read, descriptive, labels. Labels can identify manufacturer, origin, fiber content, and, care instructions.
Yet, even when a label is clearly printed with all FTC required elements, can it define the product's quality or value? A wise consumer will be more likely to purchase a product if familiar with a brand they recognize on the label. A valuable brand recognized for its quality.
We often label and define each other and ourselves by perceived identifiable terms:
But do these terms truly describe our environmental, social, intellectual, and sensual needs? Self-Love is providing adequate care to maintain the quality of our content.
Could you create a label that fully describes your content? Would you be able to list all your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual needs? You can imagine the lengthy list of instructions the label would require.
Our parentage (manufacturer) and place of birth (origin) may be out of our control, but the nurture we received at our origin has a strong influence on our mental and emotional needs.
Self-love gives us the knowledge and strength needed to value ourselves no matter our gender, nationality, occupation, status, or age. When we recognize ourselves as beautiful, intellectual, loving, artistic (fill in your own content here), we are empowering ourselves with what the Greeks called, Philautia.
Philautia is self-love in its healthiest form. It shares the philosophy of “self-compassion” which is the deep understanding that only once you have the strength to love yourself and feel comfortable in your own skin, will you be able to provide love to others. As Aristotle put it, “All friendly feelings for others are an extension of a man’s feelings for himself.”
You cannot share what you do not have. If you do not love yourself, you cannot love anyone else either. The only way to truly be happy is to find that unconditional love for yourself. This self-love naturally affords you with increased confidence, poise, and self-assurance.
Practicing self-love naturally assists you with defining your own personal style, labeled by YOU! Here are some simple steps to help you create a personal style that deserves your own label:
Honestly identify your needs.
Attentively identify the styles that make you look and feel amazing.
When my active, intuitive, and ambitious daughter was in the 4th grade, she entered a music contest. After working to prepare her for the competition, her teacher confessed to having trouble relating to her.
“Well, you know, your daughter is gregarious.” He said.
Despite being a word nerd, I hadn't heard that word used in this context (about a child).
“I’m sorry, what do you mean by that?” I asked.
“You know, she’s very outspoken and likes to be the center of attention.” He said.
As a young mother, I was not sure what to do with that. But I recognized it as his label, not mine, not her fathers, and certainly not hers.
“Well, perhaps she was graced with those qualities for a reason?” I responded.
We never used that word again, nor allowed her teacher to use it.
Many years later, that same girl would take me to visit the ancient British monument at Stonehenge and encourage me to love myself through a, particularly difficult time. She returned the self-love she was allowed to own as a child.
This article is dedicated to her and her loving husband on this, February 10, 2018, their 6th Wedding Anniversary. Without their love and dedication, I may have been lost after that visit to Stonehenge. But with her encouragement, I regained the ability to love myself again and found the confidence I needed to repair relationships, develop my own fashion business, and share my personal style with the world on my mission to wreck, less.
Now, it’s your turn. What's your label going to say?
Many thanks to Alissa Ackerman for nominating me for The Versatile Blogger Award. Alissa’s blog, Behind the Cloth, touched me deeply. She is around the same age as my daughters and her insight into why we make the retail choices we do, intrigued me. I started re-tweeting her insightful posts and one day she purchased from my resale store! I felt that an honor since she obviously takes careful consideration of her fashion choices. Thanks, Alissa!
Versatile blogger award?
Here’s a free fun fact about me outside the assigned seven: I love words. I love learning the etymology of a word, I love seeing how words have changed through generations and I love unique ways we use words. This is a challenge for me as I’m not necessarily an academic, so my dialogue should be casual and fun when I sometimes I get caught up on finding the perfect words to describe a product, activity, or service.
According to the Oxford English Dictionary, versatile is defined as: “able to adapt or be adapted to many different functions or activities.” Being versatile is an important trait for bloggers to navigate a digital platform, create interesting content and be your own photographer. But the archaic definition of versatile is actually, “changeable; inconstant,” and THAT more closely describes my ability as a blogger. My life changes constantly with the demands of being a mother and wife. Our suburban life is often unstable and readily inconsistent.
So being nominated for this award is both an honor and a charge to keep my work versatile enough to meet the changeable circumstances thrown at us every day. Sharing these facts about myself as an author may help you better understand our "reckless" brand a little better.
I've always been a little Reckless! So here goes!
7 Facts about @gwenbielicki
Some are friends, some are online sellers I met at Poshfest, and some are more experienced bloggers that may choose not to participate, but they were an inspiration to me when I started blogging, so in salute, I nominate them today! I look forward to getting to know all of you better!
Thank you for the opportunity to grow together this coming year and may you find your own reckless spirit while exploring 7 things that make you, YOU!
For some reason, no one else wanted to join Hannah and me to see Les Miserables at the movie theater, Christmas 2012. Here we are after the show, all giggles, and grins and ready to march to "Do you hear the people sing?"
Pictured in one of my all-time favorite fashion finds, this uneven hem gray cardigan with Fair Isle trim. We've affectionately dubbed it my Grandpa sweater in honor of the big comfortable sweaters worn by my father. But in fact, it is part of my capsule wardrobe and will be until if falls apart.
I was recently nominated by Alissa Ackerman from Behind the Cloth for the Versatile Blogger Award. Her thought provoking posts on Behind the Cloth, dig into the reasons we make the choices we do when we dress. The award now obligates me to share 7 facts about myself and nominate other bloggers. As a new blogger for Reckless Resale, this is an honor. Thank you, Alissa!
Tomorrow the post will follow a video I've been working on to introduce the seven facts and begin our explorations into creating your own capsule wardrobe. But in the interim, my hope is that you be inspired by our #throwbackthursday pic from Christmas, long ago.
December to remember.
Every year, Fred and I explore the giving of Christmas in search of incorporating lasting memories into the lives of each other, our children, and our community. In the past, we’ve done a broad range of activities ranging from Christmas caroling, volunteering locally, and reducing our gift exchanges to three gifts each + one filled stocking.
This Christmas, 2017, may just go down as one of our most favorite. It began when Fred suggested that we attend an activity in place of exchanging physical gifts. We started with a couple of ideas that were grossly overpriced and a little impractical but quickly jumped a little out of our comfort zone and explored all seasonal activities throughout Chicago. We choose a few and excitedly printed them on the calendar.
What followed is what we’ve now dubbed “the December to Remember.” The idea evolved into choosing one activity for each of the Saturday’s in the month of December. So far, we have seen a live radio drama, a Christmas concert, toured local holiday light displays with dear friends and attended a Santa Pub Crawl with a “Twenty Something” group from the city. There were also new explorations in vegan dining, wine tasting and seafood, but I’ll leave those for another story.
This story is about exploring alternative gift giving and the joy and excitement it can bring to your home and relationship. We would like to encourage you to consider creating a new tradition through thoughtful gift giving whether you follow our example or come up with your own unique way to celebrate this special time of year.
May you be blessed and find healing and prosperity in the New Year!
Fred & Gwendolyn
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Author: Gwen Bielicki
curvy girl stylist, Posh Ambassador, aging gracelessly
Alternative apparel for curvy girls with edges.
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